


Help! My Romantic Fiction and My Love Life Are Bleeding Into Each Other And I Can't Sleep!

by Alexilulu



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Adult Confidant AU, Blow Jobs, Denial of Feelings, Dream Sex, F/M, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-15 22:15:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14798984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alexilulu/pseuds/Alexilulu
Summary: Sadayo finds Sojiro's smarmy bullshitsotiresome, and yet...there's just something about him...





	Help! My Romantic Fiction and My Love Life Are Bleeding Into Each Other And I Can't Sleep!

**Author's Note:**

> Welllllllllllll I got extremely inspired by all the good work that [ScruffyTurtles](scruffyturtles.tumblr.com) is doing on their [Adult Confidant AU](http://scruffyturtles.tumblr.com/tagged/adult-confidant-au), and a very particular piece of art for my perennial dark horse fave Sadayo (which you can find [here](https://kinkyquixote.tumblr.com/post/173916406242/shes-a-big-fan-of-literature). So, I did a little homage to such a fucking compelling piece of art. 
> 
> To be clear, none of this is canon for the AU, it's just me playing around with a lot of the groundwork Scruffy has set and a large bit of extrapolation on my part, so take it with a grain of salt and live in the moment, okay? I hope you enjoy!

_ “Oh, Lord Singleton, I never—” Lord Singleton silences Madame Renoir’s protests with a kiss, delivering an oral lashing when his tongue meets her own. How she had longed for this day, when their passions entwined like the snakes of the caduceus, and—  _

“Whatcha reading?” A familiar, greasily suave voice whispers in Sadayo’s ear, making her flinch away and nearly throw her novel across the library in shock. She had  _ specifically _ picked this spot to get in some leisure reading for once where no one would bother her! And the normal denizens of the library would never even consider it; the dual bulwarks of teaching assistant and class representative stand between her and them like mile-high walls, impregnable to all who approach.

Impregnable to anyone but a rule-breaking simpleton of a thief, of course. Sojiro Sakura sits down next to her on a stool he pilfered from elsewhere, leaning forward to try to get a look at her reading material. “Anything good? It must be good, if you bother to read it in English.”

_ It...really isn’t. _ The only reason Sadayo still follows the series of tawdry English romances is because she’s developed something of a fondness for the characters, even with the awful prose in the way as a barrier to more than the most basic comprehension. And the sex scenes are...well, they don’t leave much to the imagination. Rather than say all this to him, of course, Sadayo simply exhales and covers it with a folder. “Just some practice with natural language comprehension, that’s all. Extracurricular study is key to getting into a good college— but you wouldn’t know much about that, huh, Sakura?” Her blush that had started the moment he snuck up on her fades as she strikes back at him in the best way she knows: his grades.

“Heh, ouch.” Sojiro leans away, clutching his rakishly unbuttoned dress shirt (clear violation of the uniform rules, by the way) over his heart and reeling comically. “You wound me, dear. How am I ever gonna get that date if you keep stabbing me like this?”

“Yeah, that’s the plan. You bothering me for a reason, then, or is this just more of you trying to mack on me?” Sadayo freezes him with her most glacial glare, but it doesn’t have the intended effect. Instead he sighs, shoulders slumping.

“Nah, I was tryin’ to work on math homework, and I saw you off in the corner. And math is easy, anyway, so I’ll just do it tonight. So…” He shrugs. “You and me never talk, you know? It’s always just business. School stuff or, uh,  _ work _ .”

Sadayo frowns, instantly skeptical. “What’s your angle?”

“What? No, no angle, I just...Shit, I dunno. Tell me about your book?” He smiles falteringly, like he’s never smiled in his life before this moment, and it looks simultaneously constructed and utterly real. That cocky ‘look at me i’m breaking the rules’ smirk he gives her must have been practiced for weeks in the mirror, if this is his alternative. It’s almost endearing. Almost, if not for long experience with him deliberately pressing her buttons. 

“...Alright.” She slides the folder off of the book, leaving it on the table. “How much english can you read?”

“Ehh…” Sojiro rubs the back of his neck, suddenly recalcitrant. “Not a whole lot. I can do spoken okay, but…”

Sadayo  _ tsk _ s and opens the book, flipping through pages idily. “Well, it’s about an English lord and the proprietor of a Victorian-era brothel. It’s kind of a series, and they’ve done the back and forth will-they won’t-they for like a dozen books. Anyway, every novel always has him bedding one of her courtesans and his dialogue sounds like you wrote it, all bad come-ons and flirting.” Suddenly, inspiration strikes, and she flips far back to an earlier section, searching for her bookmark for a very particular passage.

“Oh, so you actually like that kind of stuff? Wait, is this a tsund—”

“No! It’s not...whatever. Anyway, here. If you can do spoken, listen to this.” Sadayo clears her throat quietly, then reads aloud in a low voice for Sojiro.

_ “You truly are a scoundrel, Lord Singleton. How long have you used my services now? Don’t answer, I know exactly how long and the thought of how long a span it truly is makes my gorge rise. You have come to me for your every whim, your heart’s desire for the night and nothing more. You pass among my girls with frippery and salacious language, courting them until they beg me to let them take you to bed, on your ha’penny. Then the next day, you are gone, as is your wont as the roaming lord of Singletonshire, and I am left to pick up the pieces.” Madame Renoir pours herself a drink, slugging it back and shaking her head furiously.  _

_ “Your fundamental flaw, Lord Singleton, the problem that will haunt you until the day you are sent to an early grave by some jumped-up scapegrace or a misunderstanding in the House of Lords leaves you penniless, is that you hide your true self. It is hidden so deeply down that not even I have seen it’s true nature, the man beneath the mask! Your vassals and servants, the people of your lands and holdings think you a callous lout, the sort they could never turn to for even the simplest kindness.” _

_ “But you are more than that, and I know it hides within you. I have seen glimpses of it, in so many years of companionship, cold though our relationship has long been. You are a man capable of unfathomable kindness, but you guard it jealously, as if the world would take it from you in an instant, and so you leave the lives of the people around you colorless, darkened by your presence and worse for it. Why?”  _

Sadayo looks over at Sojiro, gauging his response. Sojiro coughs, then speaks in a low voice, one Sadayo has only heard in the Metaverse. The voice of Boss. 

_ “Because it pleases me to do so.” _

Sadayo snaps the paperback shut with a slap of paper, blushing furiously. She’d been holding it so he could see it just out of habit, but if he had read it and seen what comes after— She stands, snatching up her things and fast-walking out of the library. 

“Wait! Sadayo, damn it— “ Sojiro says, only to be shushed by the entire library, and she’s out the door and gone before he recovers from the attention of the entire room enough to give chase.rare

* * *

Sadayo slumps home in a daze, only waiting for the door into her one-room apartment to close behind her before she starts stripping, kicking off her shoes in the entryway and carefully wiggling out of her stockings (those damn things aren’t cheap, you can’t just rip them because you had a bad day), dumping them on her desk. She abandons her jacket from a coat-hook nailed to the beam above her bed before collapsing onto the mattress, muffling her groan with her pillow. Now that she’s finally free from society’s gaze, her body checks in with all the aches and pains of a long, long, long day. Aching feet, bra underwire cutting into her ribs, a headache that started with Sojiro and never stopped even with caffeine and pain medicine, and the existential despair that comes with knowing it’s only going to be more of the same tomorrow.

Ugh. And add on whatever the hell Sojiro was up to, right when she didn’t expect it. She rolls over in bed, arching her back enough to unclasp her bra then collapse back down with a sigh of relief. She’s gotten so used to him being blindingly obvious about his dumb come-ons, so the sneak attack was way too effective on her. And he’s only gonna be more annoying tomorrow, after that particular display of brazen flirting.

What a...Ugh! He’s a shithead in school, especially around and/or to her, but...she’s seen flickers of something else under that, hints of a man beneath the mask of acrid masculinity that he hides under. Boss, in the Metaverse, is so different to his school persona, and the ideals of their group, the ideals that drew Sadayo to take up their mantle, speak so much more about Sojiro’s motivations than the personality he’s shown before then. He’s too much of a bleeding heart when they’re working in Mementos for his school persona to be anything but a front.

“Because it pleases me to do so.” His voice echoes in her mind unbidden, that god-awful little smirk as he said it, the utter confidence in his expression. He had her right in the palm of his hand, only for a moment, but there’s no way he won’t try to capitalize on it, bleeding heart or no. She’ll have to raise her guard as high as it’ll go, ice over her defenses until nobody could survive her glare without freezing. And to help with that...

Sadayo digs the incriminating novel out of her bag, flipping through until she finds her place again and sighs. Clearly her libido needs to be put in check, just in case. Returning to where she left off, she finds Lord Singleton confessing to Madame Renoir his affections between kisses, enumerating the times when he has felt the pull of attraction to her in excruciating, flashback-laden detail. Oh, if only she could get such an easy ending to this particular problem of hers.

Even so, the image of this roguish charlatan finally letting the mask fall is enough for Sadayo, her hand slipping under the band of her unclasped bra and teasing one nipple into hardening, and then the other, all while Lord Singleton betrays his every thought to the Madame. Revealing his every insecurity, the times he had thought to abandon her services entirely and live the life of a celibate until his luck finally runs out. Madame is taken aback by the display, and finds herself drawn to him ever more, until she sheds her dress entirely for him. 

Trailing her hand lower and under the waistband of her skirt, Sadayo teases her own entrance through her panties when Lord Singleton begins to provide the same stimulation for Madame Renoir. This has been her game ever since she started reading these novels in her first year at Shujin; follow the pace the book sets, imagining herself in the leading role all the while and embellishing when the text fails to provide suitably for her needs. Thankfully, little embellishment is needed here, the prose thick as honey with detail as he dips a finger into the Madame’s pussy, Sadayo following the motion and biting her lip when a second finger joins the first, probing slowly deeper and finding her favorite spots with ease.

The book takes a turn to Madame’s perspective, gazing with half-lidded eyes up at her newfound confidant and lover, and that’s when things start to get weird for Sadayo. Before, she had always imagined Lord Singleton as a starkly handsome blonde of fair skin, tall and broad, and the books had never focused overly much on his looks (they’re mostly first person perspective), but now she finds him inked in the prose as tall and lithe, with deep black hair oiled back behind his ears and an immaculately trimmed goatee. The man in her imagination morphs instantly from a smiling lord in gilt suits and a traveling cloak to a grim-faced Sojiro in his Metaverse disguise, high cheekbones sharp in the candlelight as he fingers her more roughly. She can practically hear him murmuring pleasing nothings that ring false in her ear, sweetness that has no backing in the Sojiro she knows. Oh, god, to watch that look on his face return, the smug grin when he tells her that the way that she moans when he’s fucking her pleases him greatly, it makes her heart flutter like nothing in her life ever has. Caught between hatred and adoration, she rocks her hips against her hand and drags a fingertip up out of her and across her clit as she imagines his mouth against hers, dark goatee rough on her chin. 

Her arousal only grows hotter and higher in her stomach as the scene advances, Sojiro exchanging his fingers for his cock and filling her up with a pressure and causing so many sounds in her mind that all merge to white out everything else. The book is fully abandoned at this point, the fantasy replacing whatever tawdry romance it still held for the sultry thoughts and words of her own mind. Sojiro’s gentle encouragement and firm grip keeping her aloft even as his cock pounds further into her with every thrust, a hand holding a leg up to reach new angles that jar every thought from her head except Sojiro’s cocky grin until she can’t handle anything more, fingers swirling against her most sensitive places until she cries out into her pillow, riding out her orgasm against her hand and slumping with exhaustion when the moment passes.

She’s asleep within minutes, worldly cares like hunger or homework or her rent payment or the state of her apartment left behind in hazy dreams of her newfound fantasy lover, each of them by turns tender and torrid.

* * *

“ _ Oh, Lord Simpleton...Your confidence in me is a balm for my aching heart.” Madame Sadayo reclines nude on the bearskin rug next to Lord Simpleton, the only scrap of clothing on his body a roguish hat perched on his brow. _

_ “Ah, and I have balm for more than that, my sweet. Here, would you like a taste?” He sits up, shuffling onto his knees until his cock looms over her, twitching as it rapidly hardens after their last tryst. _

_ “But of course.” Lady Sadayo sits up, a stabilizing hand setting on her shoulder as she inches closer to his cock, lips brushing the head—  _

“Hey, Sadayo, wake up.” The hand on her shoulder shakes her awake, and Sadayo nearly tears a page out of her book when she sits up lightning-quick, the paper firmly affixed to her cheek.

“Huh? Wh—“ She tries to regain her bearings, the dream still at the forefront of her mind as she takes in the setting sun in the library window, and realizes how long she slept. Last night was like a never-ending cavalcade of sex dreams about her and Sojiro that left her more pent up than she had been before she slept and no better rested for the trouble, and her accidental nap seems to be continuing the trend. She yawns and unconsciously wets her lips while turning to the voice. “Thanks, I don’t know what happened, but—” Her eyes go wide when she realizes who her savior is.

“You look like crap, Sadayo. Did you sleep last night?” Sojiro’s sitting next to her, his hand still resting on her shoulder, and he looks... _ concerned? _ His tone is warm, and not lowered. The library behind him is empty in the setting sun; apparently everyone else is gone, so the shushes she expected don’t come. She realizes with no small amount of both arousal and fear that they’re totally alone. And she can’t help but take in the light against his face, the late sunlight reflecting off his hair.

“I...no, not really.” Sadayo mumbles, blushing as she remembers the last night worth of sex dreams about this boy and turns away. “Look, I should—” She starts to stand, but his hand on her shoulder stops her midway with gentle pressure.

“Now, hang on. I wanted to apologize for yesterday. I was...well.” He grimaces, gesturing between the two of them with two fingers. 

“We shouldn’t do this here.” Sadayo says and immediately wincing at the accidental double entendre and recalling with no small amount of mental anguish the dream from last night of her bent over this exact table while he fucked her senseless (in that stupid hat, no less). “I don’t really wanna talk about this in public.”

“Oh, right.” He releases her, and they both stand. “Should we...get coffee or something?”

“No, come on.” She leads him out into the hallway and into the student council room, mercifully empty. Once they’re both inside, she braces the door shut behind her.

“Uhh. Why’d you lock the door?” Sojiro doesn’t sound worried, mostly confused. 

“So you can’t get away. Duh.” She advances, putting a finger against his chest when he retreats until he hits the wall. “I don’t care if you were gonna apologize, we need to talk about the shit you do.”

“The shit  _ I  _ do? I’m not the one reading English porn at school. Or is there not a rule about that?”

“Wh— not the point! This isn’t about your fucking rule-breaking or my rule-breaking, this is about you and the way you treat me. Why do you treat everything like a joke? Serious question.”

“I don’t.” Sojiro crosses his arms defensively, but doesn’t try to remove her finger poking his chest. “I just don’t treat things that aren’t important like they are.”

“Oh, so I’m not important then? Is that why you spend all day fucking with me?”

“Hey, come on, it’s not—”

“It is! I’ve walked around corners to find you filching shit from the school store, and I watched you lock eyes with me doing it! You try to get a rise out of me just for the hell of it, you hit on me  _ constantly,  _ after I tell you to cut it out!”

Sojiro falls silent, taking a breath to speak and thinking better of it. He looks away, and that’s when Sadayo knows she’s getting through to him.

“I know this isn’t you, Sojiro. You’re not that guy. Somewhere in there is a guy who gives a shit, I know it because who else would be doing something as stupid as lead a bunch of teens stealing hearts. So I wish you’d act like it, at least with us. Masks are for being around other people, not for when it’s just you and me or any of the others. So take responsibility and own up to your shit, even if it’s just for me.”

“...Sorry.” Sojiro finally looks back at her, and she steps back from him, waiting for his response. “You’re right. You don’t deserve to be treated like that. Especially by me. So...sorry.”

“Tell you what. Let’s make a deal.” Sadayo crosses her arms, and Sojiro raises an eyebrow. “No more bullshit between us, we be totally open. No more awful machismo to hide behind around me, and I’ll cut the catty bullshit. I know you’re better than it, but I really want you to show me. In exchange...Well.” She steps forward again, cupping his cheek with one hand. “We see where this takes us. No obligation, no romance. Just two people working out some...frustrations.”

“Hey, who says I’m frustrated?” Sojiro says in a very un-Boss-like quaver.

“Oh please, you couldn’t be more obvious if you had ‘cherry boy’ tattooed on your forehead.” Sadayo smiles when Sojiro winces, then nods. “Is that a yes?”

“It’s— a deal.” Sojiro swallows, and Sadayo feels his hand against the back of her head, gently cupping the curve of her neck under her ponytail when he kisses her, muttering something when they part that she inadvertently muffles by kissing him in turn, shoving him harder against the wall behind him with her hands on his shoulders. When they separate, she brushes a lock of Sojiro’s hair that came loose back into place.

“So. I’ve got something I need to get off of my chest.” Her hand creeps down the smooth plane of his shirt, cupping his erection that had been pressing into her stomach through his pants.

“Oh, if you’ve got something on your chest, let me just—” Sojiro starts, then catches himself, smiling apologetically at a skeptical Sadayo.

“Try not to ruin this moment for yourself, dude.” Sadayo punctuates her statement by slowly unzipping his pants and wrestling to free his cock from its confines. “God, how tight of underwear do you— there we go.” Finally she levers his cock out of his pants, holding it lightly in her palm. “Not quite what I expected.”

“H-hey, come on.” Sojiro stammers, blushing furiously at the warmth of her hand against the head.

“Well, I said real, so I’ll be real. It’s not bad, just...bigger than I thought.”

“Oh, thank God.” Sojiro’s shoulders slump, and Sadayo can’t help but giggle.

“Men are so easy.” She rolls her eyes and grips her prize gently, smirking at the soft hiss in response to even such a soft approach. She may have dreamed about it in a hundred different ways, but this really isn’t anything like then. Still, though, it is pretty hot to have a guy in front of you while you’re getting on your knees, knowing he’s more at your mercy than vice versa. Especially given how cute Sojiro gets when she starts teasing him, tracing a finger along the bottom and watching him shiver or kissing the tip and getting a little gasp of surprise that happens again when she starts sucking, drawn out into a soft moan as she toys with him with her tongue, flicking idly at the tip and watching him strain to control himself, teeth clenched.

She can see his hand clutching his thigh when she starts moving her head in earnest, and switches hands to take his hand off his leg and place it in her hair, Sojiro taking a fistful that makes Sadayo shudder with pleasure. Her heart is racing, blood pumping to all the right places as she lets Sojiro take just a small bit of control, following his hand obediently. She’s more than willing to let him set a pace at this point, but still keeps him guessing with her tongue and hands until he’s panting for breath. Not one to neglect herself, Sadayo’s free hand hikes up her skirt, fingertips brushing into and out of her pussy and leaving her panties a damp, slick mess. 

Sojiro moans, long and low, when Sadayo follows his guidance and goes as far as his length will allow, grip tightening for a moment on her scalp. “Haah, god damn, do the tongue thing again, hoooh fuck, Sadayo, you’re too good at this, I’m gonna—” 

Sadayo lets him come in her mouth, continuing to pump his cock until he runs out of semen before she pulls away, making sure to lap up that last drip when it forms. Making a face, she works her mouth and mumbles “Too much...” around her mouthful before swallowing and sticking her tongue out in distaste. “ _ Way _ too much, jeez. When was the last time you jerked off, Sojiro?” Sadayo stands, tugging at her turtleneck collar and fanning herself while Sojiro gets himself put back together and zips up his pants. 

“No way in hell I’m answering that.” Sojiro grimaces when she wraps both arms around his bicep, clinging to him and grinning up at him.

“Fine, fine. Just try to be considerate, alright? A guy like you probably builds a load up like that every couple days, so take care of it for me.”

“Whatever. What’s with you, don’t you want me to...well…” Sojiro trails off, rubbing his neck. 

“Ehh, some other time. I’ve got a shift at work I’m gonna be late for if I don’t go now.” Sadayo releases him, unblocking the door and hiking her bag over her shoulder. “Call me, okay? Don’t just act like you can handle the weight of the world on your own, you dope.” She mimes placing a smartphone against her ear with the palm of her hand, smiling. “I’ll be thinking of you tonight.”

“Right.” He waves hesitantly when Sadayo leaves, then drops his hand to his side, sighing. “What the hell did I just get myself into. A confidant…?”


End file.
